NAUGHTY SMS

NAUGHTY SMS NAUGHTY SMS

1:A General asks a young lady officer, how she felt in Services?

Lady: Very fine, whole day passes in saying Yes Sir, Yes Sir & the whole night in No Sir, No Sir!

2:

Friend: Kabhi condom ke bina nahin karta. Santa: Ungli mein bhi condom pehnta hoon.

Banta: Main to bilku risk nahin leta, padosi se karwata hoon.

INDIA KI REET... Ladki agar apni marzi se de de to PYAAR... Agar Dost Dilwaye to UPHAR... Ghar wale dilwaye to SANSKAR... aur agar apne aap lele to... BaLaTkAar...

3 - sanjay It's better to stay away from girls. Only one or two can bring SMILE to your life, remaining will steel your HAPPINESS from your life santhu

School mein bachche ke papa ne teacher se kaha: Madam ji thodi aap koshish karo, thodi hum karte hain, bachcha to nikal hi jayega...! Ek bus mein ladko aur ladkiyo ki team bani antakshari khelne ke liye.

Girls: Hum tumko harakar dikhayenge..

Boys: Hum haar gaye, chalo ab dikhao.

4:amol

CONGRATS.Your phone has been installed with a new puzzle game. To play,throw your phone against the wall.Then assemble the pieces....

5

When is that

the skin meets skin,

hair meets hair

n balls disappear..

dirty mind

its when

u BLINK UR EYES

6:Girl: Will you love me after marriage also?

Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me. When a man talks dirty 2 a women, its sexual harassment,

when a women talks dirty 2 a man, its $$$ per minute!

He came 2 me 1 nite

explored my body

licked

sucked

swallowed

& had his fill

wen satisfied he left...

I was hurt...

F***IN MOSQUITO

U Dirty Mind (shah,banasthali)

7:

It gets Longer

when U hold it

N pass between

women Breasts

N enters into

A hole

What is it?

1 min 2 think!

Car Seat Belt

U dirty mind.

8

1 day as I came home early from work, I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said, "Because you came home early." A baby dog asks mama dog: How papa looks like. Mama dog said: "Your dad came from behind, I do not have the chance to see its face carefully!"

Do you like mathematics? If so, add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and we can multiply! A man had "I LOVE YOU" tattooed on his dick. He went home and proudly showed his wife. "There you go again, trying to put words into my mouth", she said

9:In a bar 1 Guy says 2 another

"I slept wid ur mom last nite"

D whole bar was waiting 4 d other Guy's response.

He laughs & says, "Lets go home dad, U r drunk"

10: Khudi Ko Kar Kanjoos Itna Ke Har SMS Bhejne Se Pehle...

Service Center Wale Call Kar Ke Poochen...

Kheriat To Hai...

Ae Customer Aaj Tujhe Hua Kya Hai...??

|______|____

| |

| " 0

| /|\ pahnasi

| |

| JL

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yeh b tumhari tarha bohat kam sms karta tha

.

.

latka diya hai ab pahnasi par

.

.

ab tera kia ho ga kalia....?

14: O mere makhna meno yad rakhna,

Har velay hasna koi problem hovey te dasna,

kisey da dil na torna,

Mgar sms karrna na chadna

15: saare gawahon our bayanon ko MAD-E-nazar rakhte huwe ye Adalat dafa 420 k tahet SMS parhne wale ko SMS NA BHEJINE K JURM ME.....

KANJOOS, Qarar deti hai.

16: Kabhi yaad aye to fone ker lena,

Paisy kam hon to SMS ker lena,

Agar Yah bi na ker saky to mobile dahi main daal ker

VIBRATION on kerna,

or lassi bana ke pi lena

17:

Nigahon ko kiski talash hoti hai,

Dil mein kisi kisi ki aas hoti hai,

Tere bin kisi cheez ki kami tu nahi,

Mgr teri sms bin tabiat kharab hoti hai.

18: O mere makhna meno yad rakhna,

Har velay hasna koi problem hovey te dasna,

kisey da dil na torna,

Mgar sms karrna na chadna

19: Masrofiat*

Kanjusi*

Gurbat*

Laparwahi*

Narazgi*

Ghuroor*

Hath ki chot*

Mobile ki kharabi*

Alfaz ki qillat*

Ya koi aur wajah hai message na karne ki???

20:

Message pe message bhejte ho,

bhej bhej kar bhaja kharab karte ho,

bhajte ho to kya bhejte ho,

dusron ka bheja hua bhejte ho.

21: Muskurahat ap ke sms say milti hay,Dil ko rahat ap k sms say milti hay,Band mat karna kabhi sms ka darwaza,kyunki Dil ki yeh darkan ap ke sms say chalti hay.

22: Diya hai uper wale ne Mobile to

Inta to kadar kiya karo

Karo na karo call.. par hazoor

do-char SMS to kiya karo

hey! keep missing me & win Xciting prizes!

23:

1st Prize

LOTS OF LUV

2nd Prize

LIFE TIME FRNDSHIP

3rd Prize

FREE STAY IN MY HEART.

Offer valid till I die,

22: Nigahon ko kiski talash hoti hai,

Dil mein kisi kisi ki aas hoti hai,

Tere din kisi cheez ki kami tu nahi,

Mgr teri sms bin tabiat kharab hoti hai.

23

Nigahon ko kiski talash hoti hai,

Dil mein kisi kisi ki aas hoti hai,

Tere din kisi cheez ki kami tu nahi,

Mgr teri sms bin tabiat kharab hoti hai.

24:

Ramchandra keh gaye siya se aisa kalyug aayega,

Ek dost ek taraf se SMS karega, doosra apna paisa bachayega.

25:

Kya lekar aaya tha?

Kya lekar jayega?

Mujhe SMS na karke zaalim,

Tu kitna chillar bachayega?

26:

Ram Ram frendwa kaisn ho,

hamar se koi galti hui gawa kya?

Tohar smswa ke darshan kiye 1 jamana beet gava,

tanik ek dui smswa bhijwai do hamar tuntuniya pe.

27:

Sitam sahne ki bhi had hoti hai,

kisiko satane ki bhi had hoti hai,

sms bhjne ki koshish karo janab,

mufat ke sms padhne ki bhi had hoti hai.

28:

Sms karenge hum ek duje ko bari bari,

hame lagti hai ye rasam badi pyari,

ye sms milte hi ek sms bhej dena,

kyunki hame bilkul pasand nahi udhari.

29:

aapki missed call bindaas hai,

aapke sms lajawab hai,

kabhi kabhi call bhi kar liya karo,

suna hai aapki aawaz first class hai.

30:

Message pe message bhejte ho,

bhej bhej kar bhaja kharab karte ho,

bhajte ho to kya bhejte ho,

dusron ka bheja hua bhejte ho.

31:

if u have one father call me,

if u have two fathers than miss call me

if u have three fathers than sms me

if i am ur father than no response.

32:

Last Night Moon Said to me If your Friend Could not SMS to you. Why could not leave your friend

I look back at the moon and said.

Ohe!

koi banda Gareeb Vi honda ha.

33:

Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham(Meray SMS na Hongay KAM)

Kabhi Alvida Na kehna (SMS kartay rehna)

Dhoom(..Mera SMS parh k jhoom)

Hera Pheri (Ab SMS KI bari Teri).

34:

Rah rah kar apki yaad aati hai, sms na aane ki wajah satati hai, sochte rahe hum zaroor koi gham hai, yaa ab aapke dil me hamare liye jagah kam he.?

35:

Every tear is a sign of brokenness, every silence is a sign of loneliness, every smile is a sign of kindness, every SMS is a sign of rememberance.--

keep messaging me,

win xcting prizes:

1st pries a lot of love.

2end pries life time frindship with me.

3erd pries free stay in my heart

38:

B4 u speak - listen,

B4 u write - think,

B4 u spend - earn,

B4 u criticise - wait,

B4 u pray - forgive,

B4 u quit - try,

B4 u msg others - msg me

39:

sms,sms,sms,sms,sms,sms,sms,sms,sms, sms,sms,sms,sms,sms,sms,sms,

Kya aap ko kisi nay aaj tak itnay sms bheje hain? Batao!

40:

---

".__""

"_/.."_"

"e_,".;( )

c"./c,./-c./

ja tommy ja. ja log mujhay masege nahe kertay un kay MOBILE par su su ker aa

41:

kanjoos ki zindagi kya jeena..

kabhi humari tarah bhi jiya karo..

roz mere sms padh kar sharam nahi aati..

kabhi khud bhi sms kiya karo..!

42;

Sitam sahne ki bhi had hoti hai,Kisi ko sataneki bhi had hoti hai, SMS bhejne ki koshish karo Dost,Mufat ke sms padneki bhi had hoti hai...

ANSWER:

HEART!!! But i luv the way u think...

Mental anxiety,

Mental breakdowns,

Menstrual cramps,

Menopause...

Did you ever notice how all women problems begin with MEN! Sali: Jija ji 500 rs. dedo, agley hafte doongi...

Jija: 1500 lele par abhi de..

44;

(')

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/ /

/ /

(')

)/ /

"o (')

.' )/ /

o""o (')

( '.' )/ /

o""o (') HELLO!

( '.' )/ /

( . )Geeh som1's got a dirty mind!

(_,_)2 stay

(') Young

// +SEXY

(,))

) ' (

(_,_)DO

(,))

) ' (

(_,_)THiS

//

(,))

) ' (

(_,_)MÖre

(,))

(_,_)

(')'; OFTEN

// ';

(,)) '

45;Q:Whats the difference between magnets and women

A: magnets have a positive side

Met a girl the other day who has a seashell tattooed on her inner thigh. It's amazing, if you put your ear to it you can smell the sea!

46; - juli

Teacher: Name some films that have almost same stories?

Pappu: Madam, Blue films.

47:: - deepraj One day there was this naked man and elephant, the elephant looks at the naked man for a few seconds, ask the naked man, "HOW CAN YOU BREATH THROUGH THAT LITTLE THING?"

Q: Whats the difference between a computer and a woman?

A: A computer doesn't laugh at a 3½ inch floppy.

School mein bachche ke papa ne teacher se kaha: Madam ji thodi aap koshish karo, thodi hum karte hain, bachcha to nikal hi jayega...!

Hair oil ki ad mein hair dikhate hain, Skin cream ki ad mein Skin, Toothpaste me Teeth, Footwears me Feet, par WHISPER ki ad mein kuch nahi dikhate????

Jaago Grahak Jaago! A lady from 2nd floor asking a bananawala: Kaise diye?

Bananawala: Memsaab Aath mein Bara.

Lady: Saat mein Tera deta hai to oopar aaja.

Daughter: Mom, kya yeh sach hai ki ladke jahan apna l*nd dalte hain, bachha wahin se nikalta hai?

Mom: Haan.

Daughter: Oh my god! To kya mera bachha mere muh se niklega? Jad aapji da janam hoya te tusi nange si te cheekan maar rahe si,

te hun jad tusi nange hunde ho te koi hor cheekan marda hai.

Sab time-time di gal hai!

Naughty SMS submitted by : - jayesh

Send Me SMS

55: Majnu ko Laila ka SMS nahi aaya usne 3 din se khana nahi khaya. Woh marne wala hai Laila ke pyar mein,Aur Laila baithi hai SMS free hone ke intezar mein ..........................

56: Pyar Karne Ka Andaaz Aana Chahiye,

Yaad Karne Ke Liye Meethi Yaad Aani Chahiye,

Aap Hamein Roz Call Karo Ya Na Karo,

Par Pyara Sa SMS Roz Ana Chahiye.

57: Hum ne kab tum se mulaaqat ka wada chaha door reh kar bhi tumhe tum se ziada chaha es bar shiddat se yaad aein tum jab tumhe sms na karney ka erada chaha

58: Ashyanon ko jlaya na karo ,,, stayaoon ko our staya na karo,,, SMS nahein karna to na karo lakin Miss call de kar kanjosi dekhaya na karo.